Fantastic way of framing 1:1s! It gets you out of the usual way of doing them and gets you thinking in a different way to get the most out of them. Especially as someone who does 1:1s from both sides as a manager and “managee”, it can be so easy to get stuck in the trap of only using 1:1s as a status update 🫠
Really practical framework here, and the question itself is genuinely underused. Most managers are conducting stay interviews after the decision is already made, which is just a more comfortable version of an exit interview.
The one thing worth adding: the question only works if the trust infrastructure is already there. In a low-trust environment, the answer to "why would you leave tomorrow?" is still going to be "I'm fine" because the risk of honesty feels higher than the benefit of being heard. The question is a tool, but the relationship is what makes the answer useful.
Which means the real prerequisite to this whole approach is the consistent, everyday behavior that signals to someone that their honest answer won't cost them anything. Build that first, and the question almost asks itself.
Yep agreed! I think it's a cycle too, we have to start asking these questions even before the team are ready, and for the first few months, the answer might be 'I'm fine', but over the course of a year or so they hopefully start to feel comfortable to open up.
But yes, absolutely that consistent behaviour need to be in place too.
Yes I have these, I use these for struggles and unblocking anything that needs to be unblocked. The fortnightly ones I think can be a bit more freeflowing and more of a space held for the team, as opposed to anything too rigid.
One approach worth trying (it's had great results with our clients): flip the ownership entirely and let the employee lead it. No manager agenda, no set questions. The employee brings what matters to them that week: what they're working on, what's getting in the way and where they're struggling, what they need from you, etc.
When employees own the 1:1, the conversation stops being something that happens to them and starts being something they invest in. And you get much more honest signal than any question you could ask, because they chose what to surface, which tells you a lot on its own.
Agreed with Ryan! I leave the space as much for them and their ownership as possible.
It's if they come with nothing I'll ask some smaller Qs like:
- 'how has this week felt?'
- 'Are you struggling with anything at the minute?'
It's also worth nothing, I keep suppppper organised, so from the fortnight before, I'll have notes of what we spoke about, and will check back in regarding those things too
Fantastic way of framing 1:1s! It gets you out of the usual way of doing them and gets you thinking in a different way to get the most out of them. Especially as someone who does 1:1s from both sides as a manager and “managee”, it can be so easy to get stuck in the trap of only using 1:1s as a status update 🫠
Yep! Agreed.
Really practical framework here, and the question itself is genuinely underused. Most managers are conducting stay interviews after the decision is already made, which is just a more comfortable version of an exit interview.
The one thing worth adding: the question only works if the trust infrastructure is already there. In a low-trust environment, the answer to "why would you leave tomorrow?" is still going to be "I'm fine" because the risk of honesty feels higher than the benefit of being heard. The question is a tool, but the relationship is what makes the answer useful.
Which means the real prerequisite to this whole approach is the consistent, everyday behavior that signals to someone that their honest answer won't cost them anything. Build that first, and the question almost asks itself.
Yep agreed! I think it's a cycle too, we have to start asking these questions even before the team are ready, and for the first few months, the answer might be 'I'm fine', but over the course of a year or so they hopefully start to feel comfortable to open up.
But yes, absolutely that consistent behaviour need to be in place too.
If you’d have biweekly one-on-ones (which we have) what would they look like for you? What would the focus be then?
Yes I have these, I use these for struggles and unblocking anything that needs to be unblocked. The fortnightly ones I think can be a bit more freeflowing and more of a space held for the team, as opposed to anything too rigid.
Ok, yes just wanted to clarify that! Thanks for your quick response!
Any leading questions you have during those fortnight meetings?
One approach worth trying (it's had great results with our clients): flip the ownership entirely and let the employee lead it. No manager agenda, no set questions. The employee brings what matters to them that week: what they're working on, what's getting in the way and where they're struggling, what they need from you, etc.
When employees own the 1:1, the conversation stops being something that happens to them and starts being something they invest in. And you get much more honest signal than any question you could ask, because they chose what to surface, which tells you a lot on its own.
It can be a little awkward for both employee and manager at first because we haven't been taught to do it this way, but here's some more in-depth info to help with that switch, if interested: https://thereadyset.substack.com/p/flip-the-script-why-your-11s-should
Agreed with Ryan! I leave the space as much for them and their ownership as possible.
It's if they come with nothing I'll ask some smaller Qs like:
- 'how has this week felt?'
- 'Are you struggling with anything at the minute?'
It's also worth nothing, I keep suppppper organised, so from the fortnight before, I'll have notes of what we spoke about, and will check back in regarding those things too