24 harsh truths all managers need to face
(and a big In The Making milestone)
Hey team, happy Tueday,
There are a lot of new faces here. We’ve grown from 19,000 to 24,000 subscribers in the last 30 days and I’m so very pleased you’re here.
In The Making is my weekly Substack newsletter and community for new managers. We know that best leaders aren’t finished products, we’re built in the messy middle of real work, real people, and real pressure.
And hey btw, I’m Heather, and I’ve spent the last 10 years managing teams, from the Harrods shop floor to Ops Director in corporate tech. I’m no leadership guru and will never claim to be. But I’m addicted to learning, and I know you are too, so I created this space to share my messy, real lessons of leadership in depth.
My hope is that these weekly emails bring clarity, growth and even joy to your work, and offer a quiet, precious realisation: ah, it’s not just me who feels this way.
If you’re here, you’re exactly where you should be. Because no matter what stage in your leadership journey, we’re all still In The Making.
I won’t do this big intro every time I’m just really glad you’re here. The more of us learning together, building a world where people can love the work they do, the better. And if you’ve been here a while, know I’m endlessly grateful. Now, back to the point…
24 harsh truths all managers need to face
Over the last few years, I’ve worked with leadership teams across global corporates, scale-ups and founder-led businesses, delivering talks and workshops to managers under real pressure to perform. And across thousands of conversations, workshops and leadership rooms, the same patterns show up again and again.
Different industries. Different titles… But the exact same struggles.
That repetition matters. Because when the same issues show up everywhere they’re strong signals. And only when we stop defending our ego and start listening to those signals, can real growth begin.
The 24 truths I’m about to share aren’t here to flatter you. They might sting a little because they ask us to let go of comforting stories about ourselves. But these are the truths that sit underneath confident, respected leadership. So if you’re willing to read with openness rather than armour, we’re cooking.
I want you to actively engage with this, so if you strongly agree or disagree with any of the points, please comment below which number (or hit ‘reply’ to this email and let’s chat).
24 harsh truths all managers need to face, let’s go…
Giving tough feedback is hard. But managing the same underperformance for months is harder. Choose your hard.
People pleasing is costing you respect.
If your team won’t make decisions without you, it’s becuase you’ve trained them not to.
You cannot scale effort. You can only scale systems.
The greatest leaders ask more questions than they answer.
Leadership isn’t about being in the spotlight, it’s about shining the spotlight on others.
Conflict avoided always returns, usually louder.
Your intentions don’t matter, only your impact does.
If each individual’s success measures aren’t clear, accountability can’t exist.
Nothing will lose you great employees faster than them watching you tolerate a bad one.
If everything still relies on you, you’re not leading, you’re just depended on (and it feels good to feel needed).
If you wait to feel confident before you act, you’ll wait forever. Leadership requires courage first.
Delegation only works if you delegate the ‘why’, not just the ‘how’.
Being busy is not evidence of value.
If you’re constantly firefighting, you’ve trained yourself to be the rescuer. Stop fixing and start coaching.
Avoiding discomfort always costs more later.
Most performance issues are clarity issues in disguise.
If feedback has been bottled up until an appraisal and lands as a surprise, it’s a leadership failure.
Respect is built through consistency.
If you protect people from consequences, you steal their growth.
Leadership isn’t being needed, it’s about becoming unnecessary.
If you’re exhausted, look at what you refuse to let go of (cough, meetings, cough).
Being clear will upset some people. That’s the job.
If the team can function without you, that’s not failure, that’s leadership.
Which number do you agree with most? Or disagree?
Let’s chat…
Peace,
H x
P.S. I’m running a free community webinar tomorrow
💥 How to be a respected leader in 2026: The 4-part system to lead with authority and stop firefighting 💥
📅 Wednesday 14th Jan
⏰ 12pm GMT / 7am EST
I’ll walk you through a practical framework used by thousands of managers to:
step out of people-pleasing without becoming harsh
prioritise properly, so you’re not stuck in the weeds
create accountability without chasing or micromanaging
handle conflict and feedback in a way that builds long-term respect
It’ll also be recorded, so if you can’t attend live, register and we’ll send out the recording straight after!
Really great tips here!
I agree with every single point here! Thank you! I need to come back often and remind myself